Showing posts with label Toronto. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Toronto. Show all posts

2010/10/23

End of a cycle, thoughts and all that jazz...




Those of you familiar with Toronto landscape will recognize the CN Tower. A reminder that I'm just at a rock throw's away from the urban world.

By that time last year, I went for the first time to the Islands.  Been to Toronto many times, and I knew the islands, but I never thought that so close to the urban core there would be such a jewel.

I brought my camera with me.  I always view photography as a way for the visual guy that I am to tell you visually the things I want to say.

So a year later, I figure it was time to return to the same spot.  A year later, the end of another cycle of ... life.

And what a year it's been.  The mental illness of my dad to its late stage, and out of nowhere the diagnosis of a generalized cancer and almost as if someone "upstair" heard our muted terrible wish...  gone peacefully was my dad to that other world.

I'm still debating whether he knew that this was going to be it, as his mental illness and then being on powerful drugs to provide a "quality of life" that make you wonder in these circumstances... it is one question among soooooooo many that becomes answer-less and pointless.

When you see your dad going away, you feel like a giant in the middle of emptiness.  A giant shadow of myself, very fragile, feeling terribly alone without the family around.

A cruel society that expects from you to perform zillions of administrative tasks.

Being given 24 hours by the nursing home to clean up dad's room was a prelude to many tough unpleasant tasks upcoming.  Contrary to my shadow on the sand, I wasn't very strong on my legs...


As I walk toward the beach, the "clothing optional sign" made me smile.  It is so cold this late in the season that it's not an option anymore.

In fact, as I near the cold water of Lake Ontario, I had to keep walking at a pretty fast pace to keep me warm.

We are born naked and we leave this world naked... 


 There nothing like the shifting banks of a sandy beach to remind me of the foundations I am on.

Just like I thought that I knew my dad and I was so sure of that...

Seeing all my world shifting once again, albeit in a wonderful way this time, to discover that my dad had a life I didn't know... to the point that 6 wonderful women who are calling me... brother ?!?

Whao...

I'm watching the sunset.  One reoccuring question: Why ?

The person who could answer my question isn't there anymore, and I wonder: At this point in time in my life, does it still  matter?

Isn't the point that we are all reunited?

No matter your reasons,

I love you, dad.

===
Live the present time and look forward for the future.  That's my thinking.
===

Yup, there are going to be several more chapters in that book...

Colleagues who've been reading my blogs tell me that I should write a book about my caregiving era...  While joking that a book is soooo... 20th century, I wonder who am I to tell others...


As I return to civilization, I was thinking of two famous phrases, one in French, the other in English:

"Je n'ai fait que mon devoir".  I did my duty.  The duty of a son.

Yet in French, the word "que" implies something restrictive.  I did *only* my duty?  No...

"It's a labour of love".

That's the whole point.

Cheers,

-J

2009/04/14

Internet on the go: I bite at the bait...

I bite at Fido's offer for "broadband internet" (so called 3G), 1Gig for $30 per month.

This is getting decent, and closer to what the Americans charge.

For the upcoming months, I'll be traveling once to twice per month. (Those who know me, I'm a caregiver to my parents, and I need a break. Since it takes so much planifications with our social services to have such breaks, the deal I've done with them is to set ahead of times all those breaks, so they'll be able to do my job while I'm away (and on top of what they _already_ do, which is _a lot_)

The good side is now I know all my vacations all the way to September. The bad side of course is that it's rigid. I can't change days easily. Oh well... )

If you have traveled a little bit... and like me you bring your laptop, you know there are less and less hotels offering *free* internet service. And when it's free, it's so lousy that you congratulate yourself for not paying for it.

Then, on trains (and even some buses) Wi-Fi internet is becoming available (at a cost, of course), and of course it's already there at all major airports. When you have to kill time, internet is great for that. :)

When you have to pay for your internet access, it seems that most providers in the US and Canada have come up with a standard price: Around $10 for 24 hours.

Then, Fido's $30/month for broadband service would pay for itself after 3 days of use per month. Which is likely to happen, in my case.

ANd for work, I need a backup access to the company's VPN. I'd love to ditch my land line and the antiquated 56k modem for that reason. That would be the other reason for giving a try.

First hurdle: Fido itself. My cellphone can also act as a cellular modem to my laptop. So I ask the $30/month data deal to be added to my voice cellphone service. After lenghty search, the sales' rep told me that my cellphone isn't eligible.

Huh ?

No, I need to buy or get for "free" if I sign a 2-year contract with Fido a USB key that acts as a cellular modem.

-Ma'am, my cellphone does *already* that. I carry already too much electronic devices with me when I travel, so why I need your USB thingy when my cellphone can do the same thing ?!?

The problem is with Rogers, (owners of Fido). In other words, they're doing just about every illogical things they could do. (For instance, we were the *last* industrialized country to have the iPhone in Canada, because Rogers has the monopoly on GSM in Canada, and they thought that the iPhone wasn't important and no one would buy it. This got Apple people fuming at Rogers.

The same could be said when Rogers bought Fido, the first thing they did, was to ditch the Sidekick (called Hip-Top in Canada), which was the iPhone's ancestor (and still an aptly competitor today), while in the US, T-Mobile were playing big on the Sidekick, and even developping niche markets, (like the deaf community) with special rates for them. (Affordable unlimited data-only rates). There were also many fascinating applets designed for deaf Sidekick users.

Phone makers and cellular carriers in the US saw the potential of mobile internet, while in Canada, they didn't even bother until... it was almost too late, having to upgrade their network as fast as they could to provide mobile internet.

So, to make a long story short, I got their USB stick. Mumble...mumble...mumble... End of rant. :)

On the photo, it's the "Novatel Wireless". They tout heavily that it is "installation free". The part that they don't tell you... You *must* be logged in with an administrator account. Hello ?!?

Since it's out of question that I do this, so yes I had to install the software and use the "run as" trick, so their software would run with admin power while I'm logged in as a regular user. It's clunky, but it works. The documentation is so skimpy that it is almost worthless.

Now the acid test. Mobile... internet. Since there's nothing more mobile than a train... I thought it would be a good test!

When 3G service is available (the light turns blue on the Novatel USB key), throughput is almost as good as broadband. There is a noticeable tiny delay, but web pages load up fairly quickly. Essentially, it's just as good as the broadband internet that you're used at home.

First gotcha: 3G data service is available in big cities. As the train leaves Montréal, 3G also leaves. 3G service is incredibly spotty on the Montréal-Toronto corridor. A glimpse in Cornwall, Kingston, Brockville, and of course, it gets rock solid when I arrived in Toronto.

Then there's "EDGE", which is the next best thing when 3G service isn't available. Think of a 56k modem... on a good day. :) It's a sharp drop in speed, but it is still tolerable. I didn't tune up my web browser, but I figure that using a large cache would help tremendously. So most of my trip were on EDGE service. Personally I didn't mind.

"GPRS". G as in Gasp!!! If I remember well the specs, it's the equivalent of a 9600 baud modem... when operating in ideal conditions, which almost never happen. Access to the internet is almost unusable. You must surf with graphics off, for instance.

To my surprise, I saw a couple of times my USB key flashing me that its data link with the network has downgraded to GPRS when we were deep in rural Ontario, with no city, town nor villages in sight. Ouch. That tells you how Rogers/Fido are serious about mobile internet.

A few dead spots too, but not all that noticeable. I was too busy typing text on forums and the like, so by the time I was ready to hit enter, I got again a useable signal. :)

So my experience of "mobile internet", in its true sense, going from point A to point B... if the bus or train offers onboard Wi-Fi access, it's likely to be superior over cellular service. You might want to pay for the extra bucks and save on frustrations.

I figure that if I were in the US, the Novatel USB key would shine. Here in Canada, and the poor state of Rogers' network, all in all, my impression is that the key did its best given the circumstance.

Now, at the hotel in Toronto, I stayed for 3 days. It would have cost me $30 for 3 days if I used their Wi-Fi service from my room. So I stay on cellular. 3G service was available of course, and it was rock solid and speedy the entire 3 days. I love it!

So, as a substitute for Wi-Fi / wired internet access when you're sitting still, say at your hotel room, airports, etc... and in you're in a big city with 3G service is available, that USB key really shines. I love it!!!

Another negative point agout Rogers/Fido: contrary to broadband providers at home (cable, satellite, telcos), they have no web page nor any program to run that would measure your internet usage.

For light usage (my case), there's no problem, but if you're using it regularly, even without downloading files, that 1Gig limit could be reached easily.

My Canadian 2-cent...